Your sensual desires are NORMAL. How do you powerful claim your desire without the mental chatter?

Lately, I’ve been pondering the “double bind” that creates shame is sexual desire.

“I want to have sex, but I’m just too tired to make an effort.”
“I want to be joyfully expressed as a woman but I scared I’ll be rejected”
“I really need to connect with others but I don’t know whom to trust”
“The more I make the more I owe”
“I need to rest but who’s going to do all the work”

Death in both directions, right?

Perhaps shame is the mechanism that creates a double bind.

Shame keeps us from attuning to our needs.

It makes us feel unsafe to share with others, yet isolating only serves to make us feel more alone and unworthy of our desires — thus increasing our sense of shame.

Without appropriate intervention, shame has the capacity to create a vicious downward spiral.

In a culture that fetishizes individuality as strength, how do we internalize getting our needs attuned to as not an act of selfishness or weakness, but as of courageous strength?

In some level we may blame ourselves for not acting differently, hence the anchoring in believing in our own independence, omnipotence, and strength at all costs.

But how about we gently open ourselves to feel both/and.

My question to you is, which direction feels most doable, alive, urgent, or desirable?

Perhaps you may find a middle ground.

Be curious about the possibility of pendulating back and forth the double bind desires.

Giving yourself space for a more empowering resolution.

YOU’RE ALLOW TO GET YOUR NEEDS MET.

IT’S SAFE FOR YOU TO BE SEEN.

Comment below if this supports your today.⁣

PS: This week I have a spot open up for private coaching. Message me to secure the spot.